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Who is Captin Hook?

PTOTY Day 2
Posted November 12 2008 08:46 PM by Stover 
Filed under: Features, Robin Stover

As day 2 of Pickup Truck of the Year came to a close I found myself wondering which of the four vehicles in our test I would most like to own. My criteria is simple really. I desire outstanding trail performance, decent on-road manners and most importantly after market support. The latter of which is easily justified by the following gripe. How does a manufacturer expect enthusiasts to go four wheeling without the basic essentials we 4x4 enthusiasts actually need? Point in case: Tow hooks


A word to the manufacturers:

Extraction points, tow hooks, shackle tabs, call them whatever you like, but please, and I repeat PLEASE include them on your 4x4s. And not the lame variant that isn't usable in the real world. We the four-wheeling public need to quickly and easily attach a tow strap to any one corner of a vehicle EVERY TIME WE GO FOUR WHEELING!!! Not once in a while, or every time the moon is full. Get it together folks!

This group of "4x4 pickups" makes me sick. Aside from the H3T these trucks are virtually useless on the trail when it comes to extraction duty. Allow me to elaborate a bit:

Suzuki Equator

The front of the Suzuki is typical of most foreign pickups. One hook is present. Yes, it is bolted to the frame and yes you can get a strap on it, but the placement is so low to the ground you might as well carry a shovel to ensure you can access it when stuck in mud, sand or snow.

Suzuki Equator front tow hook
Suzuki Equator front tow hook

 

 

 

 

 

 

The rear of the Equator is a joke. Sure their is a receiver hitch, but that's it. No place to hook a strap, no place to attach a shackle, nothing. I guess you better tack on an additional $50.00 for a Warn shackle bracket if you plan to take the Equator out in the sticks. Lame with a capitol L.

Suzuki Equator Rear end

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dodge Ram 1500

The new Ram is an example of aerodynamics taking precedence over 4x4 functionality. And it's a darn shame in my opinion because seriously, all it would have required is a slightly larger opening in the plastic to make the stout pair of tow hooks on the Ram functional. Booo on Ram engineers. Stop softening our Ram and bring back the burlyness we've come to love about the Ram platform.

Dodge Ram Tow Hook

 

 

 

 

 

The back end of the Ram is also depressing. How does one get unstuck without a hitch pin? You can't connect a tow rope or strap when their is a glaring absence of tow hooks...

Ram 1500 rear end

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ford F-150

I must say Ford did a wonderful job revitalizing the pickup long favored by people who actually use them for work. this generation is leap-years better than it's predecessors. However I still think they could have increased function of the front extraction points by simply opening up the plastic openings surrounding the stout pair of tow hooks. I might add that these hooks are full-circle, without an opening. i like these because I feel confident I can tug on them with a lot of force and not wonder if something is going to snap.

Ford F-150 Front end
F-150 Tow hook 2009

 

 

 

 

 

The rear of the Ford F-150 also lacks a crucial attachment point. My guess is that some of the Ford designers get kickbacks from Warn Industries on Shackle bracket sales...lol

Ford F-150 Rear end

 

 

 

 

 

Hummer H3T

Hummer knows what 4x4s are all about. As such Hummer's come equipped with heavy duty, fully functional extraction points I would trust any day of the week. Not only are they strong but who would argue about the rugged style they add? My only complaint is that they left one off out back to make room for the license plate. I'm almost positive this was something that GM's Law department forced Hummer designers to do. The non-symmetrical appearance is just wrong, but I'll take it over not having anything like the others in our test.

Hummer H3T tow hooks
Hummer H3T rear bumper

 

 

 

 

 

So you want to know what truck I would take home....

Too bad, you'll just have to wait until the February issue of Four Wheeler comes out.

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